If your business has ever felt like it was growing and then suddenly stalled, this conversation will likely resonate. I sat down with Paul Salter to unpack what’s really happening beneath the surface when real estate entrepreneurs hit plateaus, struggle to delegate, or feel stuck despite doing all the “right” things. What stood out most is that these challenges aren’t just operational. They’re deeply tied to identity, belief patterns, and how we relate to control, success, and growth. This is a grounded, practical conversation that will help you see what might actually be holding you back and what it takes to move forward in a more sustainable way.
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Hello everyone and welcome back. I’m Adrienne Green and today I have with me a very special guest, Paul Salter. Today I have with me a very special guest, Paul Salter. I’m excited for what you’re going to share to help people do that.
I’m thrilled to be here, Adrienne. I’m excited about our conversation.
For our regular listeners, Paul is a little different of a guest and I am really excited to bring his wisdom here. So Paul, before we dive in, give us a quick snapshot of what it is that you do.
So I am a high performance hypnotherapist and mindset coach and I work with top level executives, entrepreneurs and professional athletes to help them get unstuck out of their own way, specifically by helping them unlearn the collection of beliefs and behaviors that’s holding them back from achieving their potential.
I am so excited about this. I think this is very cool. I will share, as we have been traveling the world, myself and my family for the last two years, I feel like a lot of it has been an unbecoming, an unlearning of a lot of these things you don’t even realize are in your brain and affecting what you do. But for you, how did you get into this?
So my journey begins as a multi-sport athlete, 16 years old, five foot three, 110 pounds. Everybody is bigger, stronger, faster. All the girls I had crushes on were taller than me. I was the runt of my friend group trying to find every competitive edge I could. Fortunately I fell in love with lifting weights.
So I checked that box to keep up. My mom instilled healthy eating habits in us from a young age. But what fascinated me, when Michael Jordan was in his prime, soon to be Kobe Bryant, Tiger Woods, Roger Federer, was why these elite athletes who train and practice similar hours are so much better. That fascinated me. I began reading anything I could get my hands on related to sports psychology or performance psychology. As my knowledge grew, so did I. I can happily claim six feet today.
This took me on a path of being obsessed with how the mind works and how I could leverage my thoughts and internal dialogue to get where I wanted to be.
That led me to start my coaching career as a sports dietician. I worked closely with elite college, professional, and Olympic athletes helping them maximize body composition and performance. What stood out was that the best athletes knew what to do, but something in their mind or heart was holding them back from executing.
So I pivoted and spent the next 10 years working with the general population, specifically those stuck in the yo-yo dieting cycle. My approach was that it’s not a knowledge problem. It’s a mindset problem, a belief problem, an emotional problem.
About 10 years into that journey, I reached a fork in the road. I had always had a dream of playing professional poker.
I love that you had dreams. So often people get focused on making money and lose hobbies and dreams. The fact that you had a dream and went after it is exciting.
Yeah, one day I’ll do it one day.
So I reached that decision point. It was now or never. I dedicated two years to playing poker professionally. I still had my coaching system running on the side. About six months in, I felt like I was out studying and outworking everyone, but still losing money.
I hired my own mindset coach who was also a hypnotherapist. In a short time, I started earning more money and playing at higher stakes. More importantly, the impact on me as an individual was incredible. I walked away from poker, phased out my nutrition clients, and doubled down on mindset coaching. I added hypnosis to my toolkit and haven’t looked back.
I love that evolution and that journey.
It’s been an adventure.
For a lot of our listeners, you may not have had that exact path, but as real estate entrepreneurs, we’ve all had our own evolution. Most of us didn’t expect to be where we are today, but this is where life brought us.
Let’s start with plateaus. Real estate entrepreneurs often feel like they were growing and now they’ve plateaued. They keep doing the same actions, but the results aren’t the same. What’s happening beneath the surface?
There’s a name for that. It’s called the upper limit problem. It’s an unconscious self-imposed limitation on how much success, money, or even love you allow yourself to have. Two key things are happening. One is a fear of success, often stronger than fear of failure. The second is a core belief around whether you are worthy, deserving, and capable of reaching that next level.
Now if somebody is, I think that’s really cool because I talk about fear of failure a lot. I see that play out a lot with people I’m interacting with and working with. I love this fear of success. It’s something I’ve heard but I feel like we don’t talk about enough. So let’s unpack this fear of success first because everybody listening is going to be like, I don’t know what you’re talking about. I would be fine making a million dollars. I would be fine 10Xing my income.
Why is that not the truth?
We often forget that at our core as human beings, we’re a tribal species. Thousands of years ago, if you were judged or abandoned by your tribe and kicked out, you died. You either became food for a predator or died without shelter.
Fast forward to today, those threats aren’t as prominent, but that same need to belong and feel accepted is still very real. So if you’re an agent in the middle of the pack on your team and suddenly you start outperforming everyone, what happens?
If the average is 15 deals a year and suddenly you’re closing 25, you might start to hear comments. Subtle remarks. Tension. Envy. Resentment. You begin to distance yourself from the group.
Because you’re wired to belong, you unconsciously sabotage yourself. You play small. You dim your light. You bring yourself back into that familiar space where you feel safe.
So sad. As you explain that, it reminds me of high school. The pressure to not stand out.
Let’s take it a step further. If you’re that agent having a breakout year, now there’s pressure. Expectation. Responsibility. You have to repeat the results.
Was it a fluke? Did I get lucky?
Now imposter syndrome shows up. Doubt. Uncertainty. The pressure to perform again becomes overwhelming. It feels safer to pull back into something predictable.
That makes sense. Let’s talk about the second piece. Where does that belief of “am I worthy enough” come from?
From early childhood. About 95% of our core beliefs are formed by age seven. We all have core beliefs about ourselves, others, life, and money.
To confidently believe we are worthy, deserving, and capable, we need strong evidence. But many people have experiences that suggest otherwise. Lack of attention, lack of connection, lack of belonging. These micro rejections create doubt and uncertainty.
That makes sense. So if someone is in a plateau, what’s one thing they can do?
Get clear on the actions that got you your previous level of growth. What moved you from point A to point B?
Then audit your behavior. Are you still doing those actions with the same consistency and intensity? What have you started or stopped doing?
Have you added too many things? Have you stopped doing the basics?
Through reflection and self-auditing, you can identify where you’ve drifted and what needs to change.
I love that. Because if we’re not tracking those actions, we assume we’re doing the same thing when we might not be.
Exactly. We fall into “good enough.” If you were making 10 calls and now you make six, it feels small in the moment, but over time it compounds into self-sabotage.
That resonates. Data helps us see reality instead of what our mind tells us.
Numbers don’t lie.
Now let’s talk about destructive mindset programs. How do they show up as someone starts scaling?
When you’re scaling, there are constant triggers. A trigger could be a new environment, a new income level, something someone says.
These triggers create emotional reactions. Your brain associates them with past experiences and activates a response.
That emotional response shapes your beliefs, your self-talk, your behavior, and ultimately your results.
These patterns are designed to protect you. But they also hold you back.
If you have a breakout year and suddenly earn more, you may feel excitement but also anxiety. That anxiety can trigger beliefs like “I’m not worthy” or “this isn’t sustainable.”
Your actions change. Your performance drops. You return to what feels safe.
Our brains want to keep us where we’ve been because it feels safe.
Exactly. We are wired to survive, but you’re trying to thrive. Without doing identity-level work, you’ll stay stuck.
So true. Now let’s talk about delegation. Many entrepreneurs know they need help, but they still hold onto everything. What needs to shift?
It comes down to your relationship with control. People who struggle to delegate are trying to maintain control.
This usually comes from two places. One is trauma where losing control led to something negative. The second is a belief about others. Is it safe to trust people?
That belief is often shaped early in life.
If someone is struggling with delegation, they need to understand where that belief came from and begin to unlearn it.
Delegation makes sense logically, but emotionally it’s much harder.
Exactly.
And I’ll add one more piece. Sometimes it comes down to a belief of “I’m not good enough.” So you feel like you need your hands in everything so your name is tied to the result, the validation, the recognition. But that’s not the most effective or efficient way to operate if you want to grow.
Right. Now let’s talk about what happens after someone hires support. They bring on a virtual assistant or another team member, and then they start pulling tasks back. Either they never fully let go, or they take it back because “it’s faster if I do it.” What’s driving that?
It’s still an identity issue. It comes back to control. You’ve done something for years and suddenly it’s gone from your plate. There’s a gap.
For high performers who are used to going all the time, that gap feels uncomfortable. So they fill it. Not because they need to, but because doing feels safer than being.
That space, that stillness, is unfamiliar. Learning how to be, to slow down, to be present, is part of the next level.
That’s a hard shift for a lot of people. But it makes sense. It also opens space for things outside of business, like hobbies or dreams.
Exactly.
Now let’s talk about working with a team, especially remote support like virtual assistants. How do internal patterns affect how someone shows up as a leader?
First, you have to see that person as an equal. Yes, you may have more experience in the task, but they are capable.
When you shift from seeing someone as “my employee” to someone on an even playing field, it changes how you communicate, how you lead, and what you expect.
It also improves how you delegate because you trust their ability to learn and execute.
That reduces the urge to take tasks back.
That resonates. I’ve seen people underestimate their team, especially virtual assistants, because of the title or cost, not realizing they’re getting incredible value.
Exactly. When you change how you see them, you change the relationship.
That’s helpful. Now let’s talk about the next stage. Someone has a team, things are working, and they want to keep growing. What happens at that level?
At that level, the same traits that got you there can start to work against you.
Your ambition, your work ethic, your drive, those are your superpowers. But without recalibration, they become your kryptonite.
Think about an Olympic sprinter. They don’t sprint all the time. They have periods of intensity and periods of recovery.
As a business owner, you need to do the same.
That means learning how to manage your energy, not just your time.
There’s physical energy, sleep, stress, health. But there’s also emotional energy.
A lot of people suppress emotions. They keep pushing. But eventually, that pressure builds.
When you learn to process and release those emotions, you expand your capacity. That’s what allows you to grow sustainably.
That’s powerful. Growth isn’t just about doing more. It’s about becoming someone who can handle more.
Exactly.
Now as we wrap up, if someone wants to go deeper into this work, how can they connect with you?
I have a podcast called the Scratch Golfer’s Mindset podcast. It’s focused on performance and personal development. You don’t need to play golf to get value from it.
You can also connect with me on Instagram or email.
Perfect. Thank you for being here and sharing all of this.
My pleasure. Thank you for having me.
And for everyone reading, if you know a real estate entrepreneur who would benefit from this conversation, share it with them.